Here's a few from Stephanie

By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TENJOOBERRYMUDS'
...In order to continue getting-by in America (our home land), we all need to learn the NEW English language! Practice by reading the following conversation until you are able to understand the term "TENJOOBERRYMUDS".
With a little PATIENCE, you'll be able to fit right in. Now, here goes...The following is a telephone exchange between maybe you as a hotel guest and call room-service somewhere in the good old U S A today......
Room Service : 'Morrin. Roon sirbees.'
Guest : 'Sorry, I thought I dialed room-service.'
Room Service: ' Rye. Roon sirbees...morrin! Joowish to oddor sunteen???'
Guest: 'Uh..... Yes, I'd like to order bacon and eggs.'
Room Service: 'Ow July den?'
Guest: '.....What??'
Room Service: 'Ow July den?!?... pryed, boyud, poochd?'
Guest: 'Oh, the eggs! How do I like them? Sorry.. scrambled, please.'
Room Service: 'Ow July dee baykem? Crease?'
Guest: 'Crisp will be fine.'
Room Service: 'Hokay. An Sahn toes?'
Guest: 'What?'
Room Service: 'An toes. July Sahn toes?'
Guest: 'I... don't think so.'
Room Service: 'No? Judo wan sahn toes???'
Guest: 'I feel really bad about this, but I don't know what 'judo wansahn toes' means.'
Room Service: 'Toes! Toes!...Why Joo don Juan toes? Ow bow Anglishmoppin we bodder?'
Guest: 'Oh, English muffin!!! I've got it! You were saying 'toast'...Fine...Yes, an English muffin will be fine.'
Room Service: 'We bodder?'
Guest: 'No, just put the bodder on the side.'
Room Service: 'Wad?!?'
Guest: 'I mean butter... just put the butter on the side.'
Room Service: 'Copy?'
Guest: 'Excuse me?'
Room Service: 'Copy...tea..meel?'
Guest: 'Yes. Coffee, please... and that's everything.'
Room Service: 'One Minnie. Scramah egg, crease baykem, Anglish moppin,we bodder on sigh and copy ... rye??'
Guest: 'Whatever you say.'
Room Service: 'Tenjooberrymuds.
'Guest: 'You're welcome'
Remember I said 'By the time you read through this YOU WILL UNDERSTAND 'TENJOOBERRYMUDS' '.....and you do, don't you!

Another: Normally this would be sent to true Southerners for full appreciation: you know, folks who eat cornbread crumbled into buttermilk, who say"yes, ma'm" to their mothers, and who ask their grandchildren to "givethem some sugar" and don't mean that white, granular stuff! Got this from mah sistah, Miss Rachel
Georgia:> >> >
The owner of a golf course in Georgia was confused about paying an invoice, so he decided to ask his secretary for some mathematical help. He called her into his office and said, "You graduated from the University of Georgia and I need some help. If I were to give you $20,000, minus 14%, how much would You take off?" The secretary thought a moment, and then replied, "Everything but my earrings." You gotta love those Georgia Peaches..

Alabama:> >> >A group of Alabama friends went deer hunting and paired off in two's for the day. That night, one of the hunters returned alone, staggering under the weight of an eight-point buck. "Where's Henry?" the others asked." Henry had a stroke of some kind. He's a couple of miles back up the trail," the successful hunter replied. "You left Henry laying out there and carried the deer back?" they inquired. "A tough call," nodded the hunter. "But I figured no one is going to steal Henry!"

Louisiana:> >> >A senior at Louisiana State was overheard saying... "When the end of the world comes, I hope to be in Louisiana ." When asked why, he replied he'd rather be in Louisiana because everything happens in Louisiana 20 years later than in the rest of the civilized world.

Mississippi:> >> >The young man from Mississippi came running into the store and said to his buddy, "Bubba, somebody just stole your pickup truck from the parking lot!"
Bubba replied, "Did you see who it was?" The young man answered, "I couldn't tell, but I got the license number."

Tennessee:> >> >A Tennessee State trooper pulled over a pickup on I-65. The trooper asked, "Got any ID?" The driver replied, "Bout whut?"

South Carolina:> >> >A man in South Carolina had a flat tire, pulled off on the side of the
road, and proceeded to put a bouquet of flowers in front of the car and one behind it. Then he got back in the car to wait. A passerby studied the scene as he drove by and was so curious he turned around and went back. He asked the fellow what the problem was. The man replied, "I have a flat tire." The passerby asked, "But what's with the flowers?" The man responded, "When you break down they tell you to put flares in the front and flares in the back. I never did understand it neither."
You can say what you want about the South, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north.
Give it up For The SOUTH!!!! LOL........